Paradox Point

Conservative Paradox   If the good old days were so good, then why did they lead to the present day? I have heard two explanations. One is, “they” did it. The other is, entropy did it.           The trouble with “ ‘they’ did it” is that it shines a bad light on ‘us’; for surely ‘we’ were weak, or foolish, or wicked, to be defeated by ‘them’. Weakness, folly and wickedness are not good; so by that account, the good old days were not really that good.           And as for entropy doing it; that makes sense, for entropy increases in all closed systems. Therefore, if entropy is not to accumulate, then your system must not be closed.              

                 Bergerud’s Law and Pantopia   Thomas More made a revealing pun with the word ‘Utopia’: it meant both Eutopia, the Good Place, and Outopia, No Place. The satirist More posited a place too good to be true, in order to mock what is. Somehow the world was slack enough to think his impossibility was an ideal to strive for, by flying off to infinity-and-beyond. A friend of mine, Eric Bergerud, proposes what I dub ‘Bergerud’s Law’: Utopian politics always fail, always do damage, and are always incoherent. This is due to the Outopian nature of Eutopia. Another Eric, the longshoreman-philosopher Eric Hoffer, said of utopian novels, ‘Now we know how the story ends’.           The persistent failure of utopia inspired another literary trope, Dystopia, the Bad Place. But perfect wrongness is just as unrealistic and unsustainable as perfect rightness, so dystopia too break...

Zen Wine   So red, so sweet, I quaff it quick; I do not drink this non-wine. *Hic!*   Commentary on Zen Wine:   One morning, just before waking, I dreamed that I was visited by the ghost of Julia Vinograd, the Bubble Lady of Telegraph Avenue, and Poet Laureate of Berkeley. She challenged me to a poetry duel; she’d say one line, then I the next. How could I refuse such a challenge from such a muse? So we agreed.            Julia Vinograd produced a goblet of red wine; she drank, then said a line in praise of the wine in deliciously eccentric Vinogradian terms. She passed the goblet of wine to me; I drank deep, and it was sweet. I finished the goblet, looked down into it, and could think of nothing but, “I’m not drinking, and this isn’t wine.” Then I woke up. I remembered the whole dream vividly. I counted Vinograd’s line; eight syllables long. I counted mine; oh no, nine! Nor did it rhyme! I shortened it by one ...

     Zen Math   Master: I have a three-line proof that infinity equals zero. Student: Please give me that three-line proof. Master: I have a three-line proof that infinity equals zero.   Commentary: That has three lines; it’s in an infinite loop; it proves nothing; therefore it’s a three-line proof that infinity equals zero.